GIRL GONE MILD

Ally McBeal… Bridget Jones… Carrie Bradshaw… Arguably the three most discussed (adored and scorned at the same time too) female fictional characters in today’s pop culture. I used to say that I have a little bit (or maybe a handful) of each one of them in me back when I was but a hapless 20-something single gal drunk in the drama of a quarter-life crisis. Watching these women go through their misadventures and odd-ventures, I can’t help but see a lot of parallelisms between their characters and my personality, especially when it came to their QUEST FOR LOVE! They were the heroines of my So-Called-Single-Life! Oh that infamous era in my existence when things were just either tragic or trivial.

But then again, who didn’t have an ounce of Ally or Bridget or Carrie at least once in their single life? We’ve all had our crazy attempts to chase our childhood sweethearts just like Ally did, right? Okay, we may not be as reed-thin like her and we may not be able to pull off those mini-skirts everyday but Ally’s combination of strength and vulnerability certainly mirrors some parts in us. Like Ally, I had a brain for intelligent pursuits and witty comebacks. It was also the same brain that made me paranoid and overly-neurotic which I usually qualify as having a vivid imagination.

I related so much to Bridget when I was single because I used to smoke, I also used to guzzle in more alcohol than I can handle, I’ve also had my share of public humiliations and of course I also have the inability to fit into the media paradigm of beauty. I have also drunkenly sang to Celine Dion’s “All by Myself” alone of course in my condominium unit, way before the movie immortalized that scene.

Carrie struck a chord in me because I heart NY too. She’s a freelance writer who’s always in a writer’s block (same here). She loves her apartment but could not afford it. (I finally paid off my condo’s arrears and got the title deed already weee). And I once had a passion for fashion back when I was the producer/writer for MTV Fashionista. And not to be missed is our shared pursuit for the metaphorical man “Mr. Big”. Though we both shared the penchant for over-sharing details of our love lives, she got paid for it while I got crucified by my family. (Circa 2004, I had to shut down my prolific blog because my mom and aunts threw a gargantuan hissy fit on why I had to divulge stories of myself and the family on the internet. Uhm mom, it’s called blogging. Now 4 years later, I’m totally behind everyone else)

Anyway, the common denominator for all of these femmes is their Quest for The One. Whether can’t get over a Particular One (Ally)… or obsessed with finding One Now (Bridget)… or wondering if That One Truly Exists? (Carrie)…

Of course, these women didn’t exist in real life. But even if I didn’t live in a TV show, like these hapless anti-heroines, to some degree I used to make mountains out of the molehills of random hook-ups, upcoming deadlines, extracurricular conflicts, and the ever-present existential angst of the overactive mind. Like these women, my single life was filled with Drama that either made me feel like a Diva or look like a Ditz!

Finally all the pixie dust settled. The TV shows have ended with their tear-jerking finales. And coincidentally after all of these characters left the screens, I also found myself on the last episode of my Dark Days, and that’s when I found the Truth.

I learned a lot from the liberties of these ladies but now that the leaf has turned I sadly realized that they were CONSOLATIONS and NOT INSPIRATIONS. This is not to say though that none of these characters’ happy endings and triumphs ever offered Hope to its legions of fans. It did. In fact it gave me some hope… BUT NOT ENOUGH, because unfortunately, it’s still the kind of hope that we can find in fairy tales.

After I received Christ in my life, I realized that all along I have been deceived in believing that the world owes me a favor; that the universe’s business is to make my happiness happen. It’s not about me! And the reason why I have been rattling like a pea in a barrel all this time was because I was a grain cast away from the fertile words of the Ultimate One – God!

Hollywood will never run out of characters like Ally, Bridget and Carrie. I know I’m not the most credible person to lecture to single women out there and say “Ladies, True Love Waits” because I have failed miserably in that department. Oh, how I wish I am blameless like the virtuous women in the Bible but I am but a human being – a sinner who just received Grace from our Lord. I totally don’t deserve the Love that God is filling my life right now but I have it! How do you think it would have impacted the viewing population if Ally, Bridget and Carrie became Christians at the end? In Hollywood it would probably be a major flop. In Heaven, I can bet it’s a blockbuster!